Stop Acting So Weird!
by Trivher
Summary: A story written by me and 3 other people. Odd, weird, funny, a master piece ok maybe not a master piece but we are close to it! LOL
1. Default Chapter

A/N - This story was written by the following people: Tabetha (Tablynvan); Christine (JackPhillipsGirl); Roger (KingR); Natash

A/N - This story was written by the following people: Tabetha (Tablynvan); Christine (JackPhillipsGirl); Roger (KingR); Natasha (Who I don't believe as a FF name, if you do I'm sorry!) We started a Train Story on an Yahoo Club we are all members of, where person writes a bit ends with…… and the next person picks it up.It lasted for 10 days with a total of 21 posts.I put everything together and did some minor editing.Now I do hope you enjoy the ride. 

We don't own the show or the characters

Part 1.

People say black cats are a sign of evil and full superstitions. Do you believe that? I mean if you see a little kitten playing with a piece of yarn what's evil about that? Man now I sound like my sister! What's next me giving a history of how a broken mirror came about to give 7 years bad luck? I used to have a cat name Pipswater I loved him so much. He ran away one day and never came back. I was so upset and still haven't recovered fully. Just before she left Fi was talking to mom about getting a cat if Aunt Melinda said ok. After a few weeks of begging Fiona despite her attempts, could not get Aunt Melinda's permission for the cat. 

"She said she was allergic," Fi told me on the phone that night. "But I was looking through some old photo albums of hers, and she used to have a cat." 

"That doesn't mean anything," I told her, in my typical let's-be-logical fashion. 

"Maybe she got rid of that cat after she found out she was allergic." 

"No," Fi insisted, and I sighed. I should have known that my sister wouldn't be able to stay out of trouble for long.

"Aunt Melinda's NOT allergic. She had this cat for years. When I asked her if I could get one, she looked absolutely terror-stricken. Something happened." 

"So you're going to tell me that, this cat - which I bet was black, right? - did something so horrible to her that she can't bear to let you have one?" 

"Exactly." I groaned. It wasn't until later, after I finished talking to Fi, that I was about to go to bed when suddenly. I forgot I hadn't brushed my teeth, can't be getting any cavities now can I? While walking to the bathroom and after putting the aqua-fresh on my green brush I hear something. I turn the water off to hear better and there is nothing to be heard. Great Jack now your hearing things! 

I walk back to my room and stop just before the doorway, the noise is back. And coming from my room. I slowly walk in and on my bed see a cat. I can't believe it! It's that old mummified cat that Annie tortured when we went to the ancient Egypt museum! 

"Hey kitty, how did you get here?" I asked, slowly approaching it. 

"It's my cat!" Annie squealed, bursting through the door. She grabbed the cat off my bed and rocked it back and forth in her arms. 

"Meow, meow... Annie missed you... yes she did..." she said in a baby-voice, rubbing the cat's face against hers. 

"Annie... you're freaking me out," I said. "How did the cat get here, anyway?"Was I only imagining the evil glint in her eye? 

"Well do you want the truth?" Did I want the truth? What kind of question was that? 

"Of course I want the truth." 

"Well you can't handle the truth!!" Ok Annie's little Tom Cruise movie fest had gone to her head. I don't have time for this, it's properly not even the same cat, cats do look a lot alike. 

"Whatever Annie, now please leave I want to get some sleep." Why isn't she leaving? 

"Annie Winifred Thelen! Get out of here!" Sometimes yelling is the only way. "I told you to never to call me that! I'm gonna let ya' in on a little secret, K-Mart sucks. And so do you!" Now I'm going to pretend that made sense. She then leaned real close to my face and stared as me with narrowed eyes. Then, she threw her head back like some sort of mad scientist and cackled, "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Before I had time to react, she darted out the door, still holding the now terrified cat in her arms. I was about to run after her when I heard another noise. 

"Not again..." I muttered. I listened more closely... it sounded like pounding! It's coming from my closet! I approached my closet carefully and pulled the doors open to find myself face-to-face with my mom and Carey. 

"Oh gross! Get out of there!" At least they weren't making out or anything but I know they had been.

"Thanks honey the door got stuck again." I just roll my eyes while stepping aside to let them by. I hear a crash and spin around to find Clu trying to balance a stack of books on his head and having them fall to the ground. Why can't I have a normal life!? Oh great now Annie is back and wearing a paper bag on her head with a drawing of a monster.

"Boo! Did I scare you?" I look at everyone in my room and ask

"Why are you people so insane?! I want everyone out of my room except for you, cuz I really think you're hot and sexy.Whoa momentarily lapse of insanity there! Mom and Carey leave hand in hand giggling, they really have to put a stop to that. Clu is jumping on the bed pretending to play the guitar. 

"Oh my god!" I scream. Annie took the a bag off her head and she was bald! With a badly done shaved job. Annie noticed the way I was gaping and her hand flew to her head. 

"Oh, this?" she asked. 

"Annie... what did you DO..." I began. She shrugged. 

"I was shaving my legs with Nair and I slipped." 

"HOW DID YOU SL--" Just then, an unidentifiable hairless creature came skidding into my room. 

"Aaah! It's a rat!" I shrieked, jumping on top of a chair. 

"Don't be silly," Annie said calmly. "That's only my kitty-poo. I shaved it, too," she added proudly. 

"WHAT?" I asked, jumping down from the chair. 

"Wait I can explain kitty told me to do it." The cat told her what? 

"Excuse me?" 

"Isn't that right honey?" She says while stroking it on the ear, the cat doesn't seem to like that and fights to get out of hands. Finally it jumps off and runs under the bed that Clu is still on acting like 3 year old. 

"Oh no! Kitty!" She's crying what the heck!? I sigh and climb off the chair to get the cat out from hiding. While reaching for her I nearly pee my pants its Ned! In a tutu! I scream, and he screams before slapping his hand over my mouth. 

"Jack, please!" he said, rolling out from under my bed. He stood up and smoothed out the netting of his pink tutu. 

"You act like you've never seen a male ballerina hiding under your bed before." Ballerina? I nearly choke. He begins to twirl around in his ballet shoes, humming to himself. Then, Annie scurries under my bed again. I hear her muffled voice saying something. 

"Jack! You won't believe this! I found your dad!" Now that wasn't funny at all! 

"Sure you did and where's Elvis or John Lennon?" 

"Oh there both in a small village in Turkey." I just had to open my mouth didn't I? Annie comes out from the bed kitty in her arms, that poor cat. And someone falls behind, it is my dad! 


	2. The rest

We don't own the show or the characters

We don't own the show or the characters

Part 2.

"Daddy?" I whisper like Fiona has done many times before. He turns towards me and smiles while climbing on the bed. Where he then jumps to the nearby desk and back to the bed to the desk and so on. While yelling 

"I am the eggman... I am the walrus, goo goo goochoob!" 

"Daddy?" I whisper. His peculiar behavior was a little disturbing, but mostly I was glad that he was here. 

"Oh, hello Jack. I forgot you were there," he says, now jumping just on the bed. "Did you enjoy my Beatles rendition?" 

"Daddy, why are you here?" 

"He's not REALLY here, Jack," Annie pipes up suddenly. "It's an ILLUSION, Jack... it's all an ILLUSION..." Dad begins to fade in and out as Elvis Presley, John Lennon, and John F. Kennedy all appear in my room.

"ILLUSION! ILLUSION! ILLUSION!" they chant. I look to my bed, where a little boy now lies. 

"I see dead people," he whispers. I turn to look at Annie--what is she DOING? She is now swinging the cat over her head real fast and keeps on getting faster and faster. 

"Annie don't!" I scream but it's too late the cat goes flying out of her hands and out my open window. Thank goodness I had it open, which I never do. Clu starts laughing uncontrollably, ok his parents should really get him on some medicine. 

"What's wrong with you!?" I yell at her. 

"Jack Pipswater was evil. It was for the best."

"Rrrright Annie" I replied and looked at my desk and Clu was laying on top of it pretending it to be a surfboard 

"Hey look at me! look at me!" He then stood up "whoa the waves are nasty today" 

"Clu get down from there before you hurt yourself!" I yelled at him just then Mom walked in the room with the pizza deliver guy. Seeing how weird this night was I wasn't about to question why we were getting pizza 11:15 at night. Ugh! He was from Silver Dust Pizza there pizzas taste like cardboard. Mom walks over and stands by desk giving Clu her best mother look. The kind that would make anyone shudder and stop what there doing. Clu jumps down and rushes out the room, I can swear I heard him crying. The Silver Dust opens my dresser drawer and starts pulling out my shirts. 

"Hey what are you doing!?" 

"It's ok boy I'm just looking for the Spice Girls shirt I lost last week," he explains, continuing to toss shirts all over my room.

"What the..." I began, just as Annie bursts into the room. Why the heck is she wearing a faux fur coat from the '70s that is ten sizes too large? Suddenly she leaps in front of the pizza guy and whips it open.

"Is THIS the shirt you were looking for?" she asks, revealing the Spice Girls shirt underneath. Before the pizza guy can answer, she throws her head back and lets out a bark of laughter.

"That--That's my shirt! How did you get that?" the pizza guy demands.

"Well, I found it in Conrad's mouth." 

"Conrad?" I ask of her. 

"Yes Conrad! You know my panther?!" Last week his name was Ian and the week before her name was Opal. 

"We'll give me back my shirt!" The pizza man screams again. Mom has now joined Clu on the desk and he's showing her how to surf. Ohhh! Wipe out! No wait she's ok. 

"So kid give me my shirt!" 

"No! Conrad wants me to have it not you!" 

"Look sir just buy another one." I say while pulling out a few bucks from John Lennon's pocket, who still hasn't left my room. Dead people don't need money right? 

"Here's 100 pounds," I say to Bartholomew (the pizza guy - his name tag is now clearly visible).

"What am I going to do with British money?" he whines, retreating from my room.

"Look! I'm a ghetto ballerina, yo!" Ned announces, breakdancing on the floor.

Suddenly I hear an ear-splitting scream from above. I look over at the desk to see Mom frantically waving her arms in the air. 

"Help me!" she yells, just before falling into Irene's arms. Now where did she come from?! I mean she literally came out of nowhere. Bartholomew glares at I think he's trying to act like a tough guy but it didn't work. While leaving my room he swipes Annie's favorite cd Barney Live In New York. It's about time someone did. Mom and Irene are singing Pleasant Valley Sunday together; Irene shouldn't sing. I hear yet another crash and turn to find Clu playing bowling with a bunch of soda cans and a nerf ball. With Annie cheering him on. Footsteps can be heard running up the stairs and then the hall, finally Carey appears in the doorway out of breath. He grabs my shoulder and yanks me into the hallways away from the others. 

"Jack did you eat the pizza!?" Ok why was he screaming? 

"No I wasn't feeling good so I skipped dinner, why?" "

Well the pizzas had some weird drug in it made everyone go crazy! That's what's wrong with everyone." Thinking back Carey had been pretty sane all night at least compared to the rest. But why was I seeing my dad and dead rock stars and presidents? 

"The doctors say it'll pass in 87 hours so until then just go with the flow." 

"I feel like I'm going crazy with them." 

"Your just feeding into their weirdness, that's all. We are 98% sane trust me. The more pieces that were eaten, so how many did Annie have?" I look into the room to find Annie jumping on the bed screaming the words to The Farmer In The Dell.

"Um she skipped dinner too." We both look at each other and fall to the ground laughing. Now why does this not surprise me?


End file.
